Last week I selflessly ran the very real risk of winning a Pulitzer Prize when I blew the lid off of the robotics industry’s secret plan to enslave us all with Robotic Death Sparrows. Because of this earth shattering story, several things happened: First of all, intelligent people from all walks of life began burrowing into the earth in an attempt to save their lives. (At least I did, and now my boss wants to know why there’s a huge hole in my cube.) Second, I was made to be aware that the robotics industry was not pleased with my exposé when I found the following DVD footage on my doorstep next to a pile of sparrow feathers.

Yes, the Robo-Mule now throws cinder blocks, and it is only a matter of time before it can throw increasingly heavier objects, like refrigerators, Volkswagens, and Kirstie Alley. Do not be deceived by its cute, pre-toss Robo-Mule-has-to-go-potty jig, the Robo-Mule is displeased, and if my lifeless body is found broken underneath a pile of masonry, you will know what happened. Continue reading