Like many parents, I anxiously await the beginning of the school year. Not so I can get the kids out of my hair (I have a job that does that already), but because a) It cuts down on the cost of day care; and b) I like to regale my children with tales of heartbreaking woe from my childhood.

“You think a little math homework is bad?  When I was your age, we had math homework assigned before recess that was due when we got back inside!  You ever try doing long division on a swing?  Or fractions while going down a slide?  THAT is homework my miniature friend!”