I read an exciting story today about how a heretofore unknown ocean current coming off the coast of…  Iceland…. means that…  Ummm, warmer Atlantic…  Zzzzzzzz  Zzzzzzzz  Zzzzzzz.

Sorry, I fell asleep there for a minute.  Global warming talk is like that.  It’s fucking boring.  You ever try reading some of the underlying science?  A group of professional bed-wetters announces that temperatures off the Ivory Coast have gone up an alarming 0.01 degree Celsius in the last 50 years.  Then a bunch of professional polluters say how there is no temperature increase unless there is, in which case we didn’t cause it.  You and I, meanwhile, are thinking to ourselves, “0.01 degrees?  Who fucking cares?”  And it turns out that we are right.

I realize that a lot of planet-saving do-gooders aren’t going to like reading this, but we need to stop with the global warming bullshit for a variety of reasons.