I overheard someone talking about how she much she loved her kids this weekend, and I kind of laughed at how unnecessary that statement is. Of course you love your kids. Evolution has programmed love for offspring into each and every one of us, because if they didn’t, how long do you think your typical newborn would last? Those fuckers cry non-stop, piss and shit all over the place, and they cost slightly less per month than the GDP of Ecuador. If we didn’t love our kids unconditionally, we’d be sneaking out of the hospital for cocktails before the fucking cord was cut. Continue reading