An unnamed 42 year old Dutch woman broke up with her boyfriend recently. So she did what anyone in her situation would do, assuming they were 13 and had unlimited cell phone access: She called him 65,000 times in one year.

On trial in The Hague (because things get mighty slow between genocide cases), the 42 year old argued that the calls weren’t excessive, and I tend to agree with her. It’s only 178 calls a day, people. I get just as many from my homeowner’s association telling me that it is illegal to bury prostitutes in my back yard to quiet down.