Mailing It In
In the span of eleven days, I’ve got my wedding anniversary, my wife’s birthday, both of my brother’s birthdays, and Mother’s Day. As you can imagine, this keeps me pretty fucking busy when you consider that I still have to go to work, be a father for my kids, a husband for my wife, and still find time to drink a case and a half of malt liquor each day.
So what does that mean for you, dear reader? Videos. Lots and lots of messed up videos, like this one from classic movie Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. (Headphones if you’re at work.)
I expected a shark to leap from the water. Apparently it’s not that type of movie.
Good luck finding gifts/planning surprises for everyone!
Thanks. I need to start a PayPal donation box to pay for all this shit. Man…
have fun!!!!
This comment was marked as spam. WTF?
Thanks, it’s been a blast. (Actually, it has been fun doing the actual celebrating. All the stuff leading up to it, though…)
Well, there’s no point beating around the bush…
That’s what SHE said.
Rimshots all around…
I hope you’re doing all of your shopping online, at night, while drunk. I always get the BEST gifts that way!
Yeah, that’s not such a hot idea for me. As you can tell by the shit I find on the web, I like seriously oddball stuff. “Ummm, Greg, why did you get me a Japanese blow-job doll mouth for my birthday?” “It’s the face slimmer!” (goes to permanent dog-house)
…that’s exactly what I mean.
Best. Gift. Ever!!
Oh man. That is hard. You’re so partied out by the end. My husband and I were stupid enough to get married on Christmas Eve (we were young!). Then the 3-year-old was born on Dec 30 and Boy was born on Jan 7th. Massive party weeks.
Oh, man, that is BRUTAL! Xmas season already stresses the hell out of me, I can’t imagine tacking onto it.
I thought all you Parental/Spousal Unit types were mega efficient at all forms of multi tasking. I’m severely disappointed.
A couple of mere family functions and you drop the ball. Just get everyone around and have one huge piss up.
Living in the desert would have it’s advantages for you too. Alcohol goes to the head more in the heat, meaning cheaper drunks, and when they pass out in the yard, you don’t have to worry about it raining on them.
I’m sorry. Next year, I’ll delegate everything to you while I get wasted in the front yard.
Also, some of my relatives are not allowed to pass out in my yard unless they are naked and I live on the North Pole.
Funny, I never thought about them being naked, but you did. Could there be issues there for you to work out with your therapist?
Probably, but in this case I just want to make sure exposure has a chance to do its work.